Background
Ali is a 2023 national finalist for the Kiwibank New Zealand Local Hero of the Year Te Pou Toko o te Tau. He is a referee for New Zealand football and is committed to empowering refugee youth through sports and recreation – the way he was empowered.
On March 30, I met with Ali just before the Kiwibank New Zealander of the Year Awards Gala. Ali drove six hours from Palmerston North to Auckland that same day. I was especially grateful to chat with Ali when I learned that he was fasting for Ramadan and had refrained from eating or drinking for the past seven hours leading up to our conversation.
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Ke-Xin:
Congratulations on your Local Hero award nomination. How do you feel about it?
Ali:
Awards never faze me, but I’m inspired by the mahi I do and the joy it brings to people. It’s great to be recognised. As a young refugee, it’s important for me to represent my community and hopefully inspire other refugees and ethnic youth.
Ke-Xin:
How does your family feel about your nomination?
Ali:
My family is proud of my achievement, and I’ve received positive feedback from the Afghan community. Coming from a difficult background, it’s an honour to be part of such an important award.
Ke-Xin:
Can you tell me about your life before coming to New Zealand?
Ali:
My family fled Afghanistan to Pakistan when the Taliban took over in the early 1990s, along with around 2.8 million Afghans, many of whom were from the ethnic Hazaras minority. I was born and raised in Pakistan and have never visited Afghanistan.
Life in Pakistan was tough as an Afghan minority. When I was five, my mother took me to every school in the city, begging the principals to enrol me. They all refused. I only attended school at the age of six when a relative became a principal.
We faced extreme poverty and hunger, but sports, particularly cricket, helped me and brought me joy. Despite difficulties, my mother prioritised my education as she was never able to receive one herself – her only regret in life. A “typical” day for me was attending school from 8 a.m. to 2 p.m., working at a factory, and then going to an English language programme centre for an hour every night.
Despite our efforts, I was banned from sitting the final exams about six months before coming to New Zealand. The final exams were controlled by the Pakistani government and required Pakistani documentation. I didn’t have any.
Six months later, I found myself in New Zealand. I’m grateful to be here now.
Ke-Xin:
You mentioned in an article hat you didn’t feel a sense of belonging when you first arrived in New Zealand. How did you eventually find a sense of belonging?
Ali:
When I first arrived in New Zealand, I tried to fit in with Kiwi culture and distanced myself from my Afghan community. After researching Afghanistan and its history, I felt ashamed about what had happened over the last 30 years.
However, I just couldn’t fit in.
I was a loner for the first two years and had mental health issues because I couldn’t find a purpose for my existence. My school environment was harsh towards young ethnic people, and I couldn’t find a sense of belonging.
Then, somehow, I became a football referee and found purpose through that. For at least 90 minutes on the football pitch, I was making an impact.
Later, university gave me a better sense of independence, and I became more at peace with my identity. I’m now a former refugee and proud Afghan New Zealander. I find purpose in my work every day, whether it’s refereeing a football game, running a project for young refugees, or presenting to a select committee in parliament on something I’m passionate about.
Ke-Xin:
Why did you initially feel the need to hide your identity?
Ali:
Because everyone feels sorry for you for being a refugee. As a young person, you don’t want people to feel sorry for you as soon as they meet you.
When people asked me where I was from, I struggled with that question. I usually answered with “Palmy,” but people often asked me where I was originally from, which can be triggering for a lot of young people who have fled their home countries.
The school system also contributes to the isolation and identity shame that refugees feel. In my first year of high school, the first-tier football team was made up entirely of Pākehā and the second-tier team was made up of people like me from ethnic backgrounds. This made me question whether I could ever be part of the first-tier team and made me not proud of my identity as an Afghan refugee.
Now, I consider myself to be a New Zealander. I don’t consider anywhere else to be my home. Still, it’s important for people to be more sensitive in how they phrase their questions and be aware of the emotions they can trigger, especially for refugees.
Ke-Xin:
It sounds like football refereeing greatly impacted your identity-building and finding a sense of belonging. What inspired you to sign up for your first game in New Zealand?
Ali:
I’ve always been into sports, but could only play cricket in Pakistan. When I came to New Zealand, everything felt like an opportunity, and I felt a sense of freedom. During my hard times, sports was the only thing that gave me something to look forward to.
When I became a football referee, I had some great mentors who inspired and motivated me. They were elite referees who had officiated at the World Cup and other international games. Training with them showed me the possibilities and changed my mentality towards a lot of things.
I was struggling with my physical well-being at the time, but seeing these fit referees who travelled every weekend to referee for the world’s best players was inspiring. I wished I could become like them. They were a great source of motivation.
From that experience, I saw sports as a very powerful tool, which is why I do a lot of work with my communities through sports and recreation.
Ke-Xin:
I see that you’ve organised Sports Fest and founded Thrive Foundation. What’s your vision for Thrive?
Ali:
My goal is to ensure that no refugee is held back due to the barriers they face, such as limited access to sports. Thrive Foundation’s purpose is to ensure that our young people thrive, whether it be in sports, leadership, education, or the arts. Our young people are determined, hardworking and resilient, but they need somebody to show them the path.
Ke-Xin:
How is Thrive helping to eliminate these barriers?
Ali:
We have a few initiatives in progress, including establishing a university scholarship programme, creating social opportunities for people to connect, and developing educational support for high school students alongside the Ministry of Education. We’re also working with Sports New Zealand to create a workshop curriculum on bullying and discrimination in school sports environments.
Currently, our programmes are focused on the Manawatū region as we believe the need there is greater than in any other part of the country.
Ke-Xin:
You spoke about what young people can do to thrive. How can the community better support young refugee leaders?
Ali:
To help young leaders thrive, we need to recognise their efforts. For example, I’m here today as a local hero nominee; but to be honest, I’ve never been formally recognised for my work within my own community – whether it’s Afghan or the refugee community.
When I see our young people playing sports, I often don’t see their parents on the side-line supporting them. That breaks my heart. I try to attend their games, ask them about their day, and encourage them. I hope those small acts can go a long way.
Ke-Xin:
What advice would you give to a young refugee who has just arrived in New Zealand?
Ali:
I would say: New Zealand is your home. You should work hard, seize all opportunities that come your way, and stay humble. Never think that being a refugee will hold you back. There will no doubt be additional barriers for you to navigate, but nothing can stop you if you put in the effort.
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About the Interviewer: Ke-Xin Li (李可心) is a Chinese migrant who came to Aotearoa 13 years ago. She loves the diversity and open-mindedness offered by Auckland. Pursuing her dream in journalism, Ke-Xin hopes to highlight the joys and sorrows of ordinary people and bring change through representation.
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Disclaimer: This interview has been edited for clarity and brevity. The essence of the conversation remains intact, and any changes made do not alter the meaning or intent of the interviewee’s responses.
